An Appalling American Pattern

So, something I've noticed about elections is that, no matter how unpopular the current president is during his first term, he still gets re-elected. It's like America, as a whole, is screaming for reform from or with the current administration, but at the last minute, we decide, "Better the devil you know!" This ridiculous fear is so clearly evident in this current election.

My husband says that it is the civic duty of every literate American citizen to read the Declaration of Independence. I agree. My mother tried in vain to convince me to do so as a child. But I recently read it, beginning to end, for the first time and as an adult, I see many chilling parallels with our current government in the description of King George's offenses.

It is becoming more and more apparent to me that the world, in general, and America, especially, is ripe for a revolution. My favorite literary quote comes not from a scholarly author or an autobiography, or anything so lofty and educated. No, my quote comes from Julie Garwood, a romance novelist. She penned, "One whisper, added to a thousand others, becomes a roar of discontent even the church can't ignore." It is my opinion that this still has a great resonance in today's world.
Here's my whisper; Where's yours?

Some days, it seems that my goal all day is this moment. The girls are asleep, all three of them. The dog is fed, silent and in her crate. Dustin is at work and I'm alone. Actually alone, and I can breathe. I don't know how to explain it, exactly. Either you get it, or you don't.

So, deep breath.

Playlist.com is playing in the background. It just switched from Leonard Cohen's 'Everybody Knows' to Natasha Bedingfield. I've always had an eclectic taste in music. Dustin says my genre is Blues. I don't know, I just know what I like, what speaks my thoughts.

My babies are growing. I've heard that's what happens when you consistently feed them.... Faith turned 4 and that would be bad enough, but Abby will be 3 on Sunday and Diana is crawling. Faith spontaneously wrote her name the other day. She's my absorber. Abby is my struggler, not because it's hard, but because everything in her refuses to think that I might just be right.... My mother says she can't believe I ended up with my sister's child. I just smile and roll my eyes and shake my head and say a little prayer. Faith comes up with the most brilliant things, sometimes. I have this theory, that we're super-smart when we're children, we see everything as it is and as it might be; but as we get older, we start listening more and more to everyone else and losing a little more of that brilliance as we go. I don't know. {I keep having to stop myself from typing 'idk', and lol}

Everything else I'm coming up to write about is sounding dumb, so I'm outta here

I find it utterly and completely galling that, aside from, and in spite of motherhood, I am an incredibly boring person. I am a proud stay at home mother and I am quite happy and firm in that decision most of the time. But I just realized that I do very little outside of that. Everything I do is dictated or constrained by the fact of my own fertility. Everything. My beloved husband, not so much. I don't have friends that I go hang out with, or play poker with or whatever the female equivalent is. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I want to go out and get drunk and man-bash with a bunch of women trashier than I'll ever be. But just once, I would like to go do something knowing that I don't have to beg him or someone else to keep the girls. Just once, I would like to be spontaneous. Why, oh why, didn't we do this before we had kids?!!! We did nothing. At all. We didn't even date!!! We stayed at home and watched stolen cable on a crappy tv, in a crappy trailer that I still think fondly of, despite the now glaringly obvious flaws. Yes, we were in love and life was good. Then we had kids. Three of them. All girls. And I'm alone, on a Friday night, while my beloved goes and hangs out with his friends and his cousin, plays poker, drinks at least a little no matter what he plans or says. And suddenly, I know what my mother meant when she would say she always feels like a drudge. Because, pathetically, that's what I am.

Driving in this town with my children in the car

Today was a fairly rainy, icky, slick day and as the evening wore on, it didn't get any better. Susan was having a family meal, so we were planning on heading over about 6. Dustin had to work, so it was just me and the girls. I debated, but went ahead and left. I decided to drive on the feeder because I mistakenly thought it would be safer. Boy, was I wrong!! I was nearly in THREE wrecks in the 20 minute drive(drove slower because of rain).

#1 - Now, this one I understand. Ish, anyway. Some mook in a white SUV decided to cross the double white lines into my lane. Which, like I said, I understand. Except, it's raining, my breaks don't work so good wet, and this Mensa candidate decides to cross from the off ramp while the lines are still car width apart. He came so close to side-swiping me, my heart stopped. Let me tell you, I found my horn!

#2 - This one, I admit, may have been in my head. But coming on the heels of the first near-thing, it was scary. A guy with an enormous grill on the front of his truck barely managed to stop at a stop sign on a side street feeding onto the feeder. When he did stop, as I passed, his grill was so far into the road, I nearly hit it. I gave him a break, though, because, well, it may have been in my head.

#3 - This guy! This complete and total creep, he comes up the on ramp in a lane that ends in mine. Remember, it's raining and dark. Does this guy slow down to let me pass? No, he speeds up to pass me ON THE SHOULDER!! This one made me so angry. Am I the ONLY person who drives with the thought "There are children in this car" rolling around in my head?! Not only am I ALWAYS hyper-aware of my children, but also the fact that other people have children in their car.

I really wish that people would drive like their children are in the car with them all the time. There is no good excuse for driving so dangerously that you injure or kill another person. There is very little worse than driving carelessly, or angrily, or recklessly. OPEN YOUR EYES!! THINK!! PLEASE!!!!

Because at some point, my children's lives will depend on the way YOU drive.

Things my daughters' have taught me....

I think the biggest thing I have learned from the girls is that nothing, and I mean NOTHING, is sacred. Not my make-up, not the bathroom, not my drink, not my food, sometimes not even sex. I swear, if I had listened to the people who said sex goes out the window when you have kids, we probably wouldn't have ONE child, let alone THREE!!!

Another thing is about poop. It really is just as nasty as vomit. There is not one single thing about a poopy diaper that is cute, and there never will be. I know that someday, these precious days will be a distant memory and I will forget so many things. But I will NEVER, EVER miss poopy diapers, period. The end.

One of my favorite things is that no matter what it is, it's always the coolest thing ever the first time around. Sometimes even the second or third times around. And Mommy rocks. All the time. They don't understand that I'm weird, or fat, or a total dork. They see this awesome mom that knows everything and can do anything and lets them do the funnest things. I like their mommy.

I think Diana is now the only one who sees Dustin like I see him. The way she just drinks him in, and everything he does is so awesome, and everything he says is so interesting. I love it all, and I find myself drinking her in and looking at him and just seeing him like that. Its amazing.

They have also taught me that I am not my mother. However much I resemble her, in word or deed, I am myself. Even when I'm crazy.

Someday, I hope they get to read this and they can know who I am when I write........

Talking with Toddlers

Some more funny comments from Facebook. Here is me documenting the funny things my girls do.

But don't worry, I've probably forgotten so many funny and interesting things about them, I'll be

feeling guilty for the rest of their lives.... Also I keep forgetting the cool things I was going to post. I

am a LOT more boring than I thought.....

Faith: Mommy? Whatchoo doin'?
Me: I'm fussing at your sister!
Faith: Ok, thank you .....
Lol!!!

Faith on the way to church this morning : I don't have a truck. I'm sorry I broke it, Mommy.
Totally out of the blue, but so cute!

Faith : I was watching wink clubs!!
Abby : It OBER, Faith!
Faith bursts into tears while Mom laughs hysterically because Abby's face was so funny.....

Faith : This is my favorite breakfast that ever I seen!
And I haven't finished cooking yet ........ lol

I just heard my kid yell, "I'ma challenge of da world! Black'n'white! HUH???!!!!

So Faith just shrieked at the top of her lungs and told Abby "You're breaking my heart! "

Faith: Mommy, I'm hunkry
Me: I have something for you to eat
Faith: Peanut butter jelly?
Me: No, noodles!
Faith: Noodles? (Short silence) Kung Fu Panda have noodles. Like that?
Me: Yep.
Faith: Abby! We have noodles, just like Kung Fu Panda!!

Faith: I'm brushing my hair, brushing my hair
Abby: There's POOP in there!
Faith: No, there isn't, Abby. It's washed. Mommy wash..... there's POOP in there?!
Abby (laughs): Noooo
Lol. Also, she was brushing her hair with a toy fork....

I think I'M more excited about Christmas, but Faith runs a close second. She's been asking if it's Christmas every day since we put up the tree. Now I can tell her, YES!

I have learned that when Faith says "I'm gonna go in my house" what she means is put the blanket at her feet over her head.

So Abby just hit another first. She crawled under the bed to escape a spanking ... December 13, 2011

Here's one for the top 10 list of embarrassing moments : Faith dumped over the cart at Hobby Lobby while her sisters were in it. They're all fine and apparently, embarrassment won't kill you. Thank you to every one who stopped and helped.

A funny Sunday

Today is Sunday and we went to church. Like we do every Sunday, late, as usual since baby number 3. What we did differently, however, was go out to eat. Golden Corral, in fact. An oldie, but a goodie.

We met Dustin's dad there, and barely found a seat. Dustin sat with the girls while Tony and I got plates. I picked out what I thought the girls would eat. Small portions, because they tend to pretend they don't eat when we're out. Abby picked and ate a bit of her food. She saw strawberries on a placard on the table and began begging for one, but was told she had to finish her food. Well, by this time PaPa had gotten a second plate of food, about half of it spaghetti, which is actually a dish I have to really nag her to eat, if not feed her myself. She looked and looked and very cutely, asked him for a bite. Which actually sounded like "Ah unt sum?!" A caveman taught the kid to speak, I deny responsibility for her vocabulary. (He's also following her around, teaching her bad words...) PaPa, like all the men in her little life, was completely charmed and, of course, gave her some on her plate. She then proceeded to pick up each strand in turn, lean her head back and pile it in her mouth. When she'd get about two inches from the end, her mouth kept being too small and she would slurp it the rest of the way. She ate about three spoonfuls of spaghetti like this. Hilarious....

After naps and dinner (Rosa's and Sonic), they were sitting at the table pulling the cherries out of their cherry limeades and eating the ice, so their hands were frigid, to say the least. Mommy caught sight of what they were doing and that ended, quick, fast and in a hurry. Faith, the little darling, came and gave her daddy a sweet smile, which totally melted his heart, so he, innocent dear that he is, picked her up and her hands touched his bare chest. Total chaos ensued. He was fake screaming and she was trying to touch any and all bare skin, giggling hysterically. Abby caught the bug, but there wasn't any room for her and she was starting to get weepy, so Mommy called her over. I told her to go around the couch and get Daddy's neck. Hah! Revenge for all those things I can't remember, lol. His face will make me smile for a long time!

Anyway, it was a fun day. Well, mostly......